The idea of the story is good, but you need more of a turn into the content. Right now, you have these ridiculous change ups that are kind of hard to swallow.«1» Right now, you have these ridiculous change ups that are kind of hard to swallow.«1» very goo though i like it :)READERReport 2008-01-03 16:52:27ok since no one liked parts 3-5 i will allow you to tell me what to add on to part 2 i will make a new part 3 based on your ideasREADERReport 2007-12-25 20:43:33The transitions are still not making any sense. xxx hd The idea of the story is good, but you need more of a turn into the content. 4 comments«1»Anonymous readerReport 2009-03-14 21:05:49good job, better with drawing out the scenes. Right now, you have these ridiculous change ups that are kind of hard to swallow.«1»
